#like me @ myself u literally did the steps needed to make the food rise and be fluffy

[gxlden-angels]

Episode 4 of SHP is paid so you have to have a prime video sub for it. I don't think it's worth it to buy prime just for the documentary. I'm gonna do my episode 4 watch through and live thoughts later since I have prime student. For now, I am perfecting the art of the frittata

[hellcaster901]

The Wedding pt 3

Summary: Y/N is getting married in a few months, and its something that she’s been looking forward to for a while. But she runs into an old coworker, one that she just can’t help feel a connection to. Not only is her best friend not helping, but she’s trying to figure out now what she really wants.

Warnings: 18+ SMUT if you ain’t 18 or over, get out of here!

Author’s Note: MERRY CHRISTMAS/ HAPPY HOLIDAYS. Enjoy the time with your family, and enjoy the time reading this chapter!!! Thank you for being patience, and more will come soon.

Masterlist

We stepped into the diner, Negan’s hand on the small of my back as we walked in. It was a cute small place, pictures of Marilyn Monroe, JF Kennedy and James Dean scattered along the walls, small records hanging from the ceiling. It was your average 50s themed diner.

“There’s an open both over there, if you guys want to sit there!” The young woman smiled, staring at Negan a little too long. I tried to ignore the feeling of jealousy as she eyed him. He nodded at her, guided me to the booth. The diner wasn’t as crowded as it would be during the day, but there were a few stragglers sitting with friends or by themselves enjoying a plate of pancakes or a burger

Negan slid into the booth, waiting for me to sit down. “I’m going to go to the bathroom.” I smiled, he raised an eyebrow, then the smug grin on his face came over.

“Why don’t you just leave it be?” he smirked dropping his voice. “It’s sexy knowing my cum is dripping out of you.” I felt a chill go up my back, a blush covering my body. I was speechless, trying to come up with a reason why that wasn’t the most comfortable of options. He realized my discomfort, giving me a soft smile. “I’ll order us something to drink.” I gave him a smile, turning on my heels and practically running to the bathroom. I threw myself into the stall, pulling my phone from my back pocket. I dialled Mary up, whispering ‘please please please’ until she answered.

“Are you okay?” She answered, the worry in her voice.

“I’m fine, but Mary.” I started, shaking my head at the excitement rushing through my body. “I just fucked him in his car.” I whispered, a loud squeal came through from the phone.

“Stop it! How was it?” She giggled, I blushed thinking back to it.

“It was… mind-blowing.” I giggled again. “I’m currently in the bathroom, cleaning myself up.”

“Oh it was like that?” She asked, I knew she had her eyebrows raised. I held the phone to my ear with my shoulder, unbuttoning my pants, grabbing a fistfull of toilet paper.

“When I tell you it was mind-blowing, I’m not lying.” I breathed, cleaning myself, making sure I wasn’t going to get a UTI. “He literally ripped my underwear off and stuff them in his pocket.”

“That’s some romance novel type shit.” Mary exclaimed.

“I know!” I excitedly said, lowering my voice when I remembered where I was. I cleaned myself up the best I could, lifting a leg and flushing the toilet, bouncing against the walls.

“What are you doing?” Mary asked.

“In the bathroom trying to flush the damn toilet.” I laughed. I squeezed against the wall, pulling the door open, seeing myself in the reflection. I definitely had a glow to me, a giant smile on my face. “Mary, I feel all giddy.” I laughed, still holding the phone to my ear. “I feel so… so... “

“Alive? Happy? Good about yourself?” She suggested, “Cause that’s how you should fucking feel with someone.” I rolled my eyes, washing my hands, drying them off.

“Ok Mary.” I sighed, rolling my eyes. “I have to get back before he fucking leaves me.” I joked. She gave me a kiss through the phone, reminding me to let her know what was going on. I slipped the phone back into my phone, walking out of the bathroom. I tripped over my own feet as I saw the young waitress leaning against the table, twirling a strand of hair between her fingers. I saw she ruffled her 50s waitress uniform, tucking it up to make it shorter, tugging the front of her uniform down, showing more cleavage. The jealousy was rising in my chest again, my jaw clenching. It looked like Negan knew what was going on, but not biting onto the bait as she hung it in front of him.

I started walking again, Negan noticing me out of the corner of his eye, a smile spreading across his face as he saw me. The waitress looked over her shoulder, her “seductive” smile falling to an irritated frown as I passed her, sliding into the booth. I heard her scoffed softly under her breath as Negan’s attention was no longer on her, his attention now on me. I smiled up at her, feeling that sense of “hell yeah, this man is mine.” But I knew, playing this little game of ‘i’m single’ wasn’t going to last forever. She pushed herself off the table, going to the back room.

“Are you good?” Negan asked. I nodded, reaching for my drink. I took a giant sip, the cold liquid rushing down my throat, Negan watched a proud smile on his face at my condition. I blushed as he stared, looking at me like I was almost the only girl here.

“Just had a dry throat.” I smiled, reaching for my left hand. I almost panicked as I didn’t feel my ring, my heart racing as I raced through my mind to where it was. I remember that it was in my purse, the hot feeling going up my back, subdubing.

“What’s wrong?” I didn’t realize that I was spacing off, my eyes snapping back to him.

“Oh, nothing.” I lied, brushing it off.

“Did you forget about your ring?” He asked, I froze, looking up at him. “I noticed it was off when I picked you up.” I nodded, feeling embarrassed. “Are you guys having problems?” My heart surged at the thought that he did care, asking about what was going on.

“No,” I huffed, thinking over me and Adam’s relationship, “I just… took it off.”

“Cause of us?” My heart swelled, hearing him call us anything.

“I um… how’s life been as a single man?” I smiled awkwardly, changing the subject quickly, grabbing my drink, taking a long sip as he stared at me, his eyes looking over my face. I could tell that this wasn’t the end of the conversation, and he was going to bring it up later, but he sighed, leaning back, indulging me in my question.

“Something I haven’t been used to for a while now.” He chuckled, his shoulders shaking lightly. I laughed with him, watching as he ran a hand over his face again, scratching the skin under his beard.

“How long were you guys married for?” I was genuinely curious, wondering what it was like being married to Negan.

“15 years.” He sighed, I could see the years passing on his face as he thought about it, thinking back on those years living, and growing with someone.

“I’m sorry for asking.” I mumbled, messing with my fingers. He shook his head, waving me off.

“What about you, darling?” He smirked, leaning onto his elbows, staring down at me. “How long have you and old Adam been together?”

“2 years.” I smiled, thinking back on the relationship. The guilt was coming back as I thought back on it, the guilt settling in as I thought back to the good times. Of course there were times, but… he treated me right. “And I’m getting married, and I have cheated on him twice.” I choked out, my throat tightening. I knew Negan wasn’t sure what to do with me, looking at me with a worried face. I felt like I began to panic, the walls almost felt like they were closing in on me, my hands shaking the more I thought about how Adam would feel if and when he found out. “I can’t do this.” I breathed, my chest tightening as I pulled myself from the booth, turning on my heels.

“Y/N!” Negan called after me. I heard him pull himself up, running after me as I stepped outside, the cool air hitting my face once again. I felt my lungs cool as I breathed, my warmed skin cooling off. I grabbed my phone, my hands shaking as I unlocked my phone. “Y/N!” I jumped as Negan grabbed my upper arm, spinning me on my feet, both his hands grabbing my arms. “It’s okay, we don’t have to do this anymore.” He whispered to me, his hands coming up and cupped my face. “We can forget that this ever happened, Eat our dinner, and go our separate ways.”

I don’t think I’ve ever had a panic attack, and I’m not exactly sure how a panic attack felt like, but fuck, I think this is what that was.

“No. No.” I shook my head grabbing his hands and pulling them off my face, feeling like my heart was about to burst out of my chest. “I need to calm down, I need to calm down.” I repeated, my mind racing to wanting to calm down, but instantly making a u-turn to Adam, the wedding, my cheating, how he would feel and react all came to the front of my mind. Negan stared down at me, and I knew I was freaking him out, and I knew he didn’t know what to do. I gasped as he cupped my face again, pulling my head up, his lips meeting mine.

And it was like my mind went blank, his arms wrapping around me, crushing me against him as he kissed me. All those rushing thoughts in my head, going around like a merry-go-round were wiped away as my mind focused on Negan. The way his lips felt against mine, the way his arms felt wrapped around my body. The way I felt completely safe in his arms. I relaxed against him, my body melting in his as he kissed me. It was all a rush, the way he grabbed me, the way I ran out, the way he kissed me softly. He pulled away, our foreheads resting against one another, our breaths mixing together. He caressed the side of my face again, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear.

“Let me grab our food.” He whispered, not letting go of me for a second. “Just wait in the car, yeah?” I nodded, breathless and speechless. He reached into his pocket, slipping his keys into my hand. He slowly let me go, watching me as he walked inside, glancing back at me as he got to the counter. I took a deep breath, making small steps to his car. I unlocked my side of the door, sliding in, holding the keys in my hands.

I don’t know what happened, it was fine one minute, and the second I started thinking about Adam, it felt like my whole world was crashing around me. I felt like a mime in a box, getting smaller and smaller, the world seeing it as entertainment. That’s what it felt like. I kept saying that I needed to end things with Negan before it got any more serious, but around him… I couldn’t stop it. I really couldn’t help myself as he stood there either next to me or across from me.

A few knocks came through the window, Negan standing there, two take out boxes in his hand. I leaned across the seat, opening the door. He slid in, setting the boxes between us. I handed the keys over, watching as he started the car, reversing out of the parking lot.

“Did she give you her number?” I joked, seeing the corner of his lips turn up.

“She tried.” He chuckled. The smile on my face faltered a bit, but I covered it with a shake of my head. “She was 17, definetly not wanting to go to fucking jail.” I let out a harder laugh, Negan laughing with me.

There was a comfortable silence between the two of us as he drove, the lights going past quickly, lightening Negan’s face. He didn’t bring up how I freaked out, and he didn’t have to. I knew he was wanting to check up by the way he glanced at me every once in awhile. I felt like I had to say something, explain myself, talking about why I freaked out the way I did. But nothing came out when I tried to talk, opening my mouth and nothing coming out. I looked out the window, watching as the buildings went by, the lights shining on my face.

“Where are we going?” I asked, my head sliding down, feeling the cold glass against my forehead.

“I’m dropping you back off.” He smiled softly. I didn’t argue with him, letting him drive.

“I’m sorry, about before.” I whispered, breaking the comfortable silence. He didn’t say anything, letting me go at my own pace. “It just felt like… everything was happening so fast. My mind kept thinking about Adam and what I thought would happen if he found out. And it all came just… crashing down on me. And it just… rushed at me and I wasn’t sure what to do.” I hardly realized that Negan stopped the car, my apartment building standing before us. Negan watched over me, letting me talk about what I could about what happened. He only smiled, grabbing a box, and getting out of the car. I watched as he walked around his impala, grabbing the handle of my door, helping me out. He didn’t say a word as he walked me to the building’s door, handing me my take out box.

“We can stop.” He told me, staring down at me, leaning against the brick wall. “No more messing around, no more of this.” He pointed towards us. “From now on, we’re simply old coworkers.” He wasn’t giving me an option, telling me what I needed to hear, telling me what was good. I nodded, holding the food in my hand.

“Thank you.” I smiled, looking down at my food, “For the past couple times-” I blushed, Negan chuckling, “- and the food.” He smiled down at me, pushing himself off the wall, backing away from the door. There were no words exchanged as I opened the door, stepping in. I glanced back, Negan standing there, until the door shut, leaving me staring at tan metal.

I sluggishly walked up the stairs, racking over my mind at what happened tonight. There was so much that I couldn’t even wrap my mind around. The mind-blowing sex, the break down, the sweet gestures Negan did to help me calm down. Everything in my body told me to run back downstairs, jump in Negan’s arms and let him have all of me, throwing this stupid engagement ring at Adam.

But I couldn't

I couldn’t throw away a 2 year relationship on the fact of good- not good, incredibly insane- sex. Throwing everything away for someone I hardly know. That didn’t sound right to me at all. No matter how right it felt.

I shook my head, unlocking my apartment. I barely registered anything as I set my keys down on the table, mindlessly walking to the kitchen, swinging my back onto the island, setting the take out food next to them. I ran a hand over my face, combing through my hair.

“And where were you?” I jumped, turning around a hand on my chest.

“Jesus, Adam?” I asked, the living room dark. I reached for the light, the bright light making my eyes adjust. Adam sat down on the couch, almost like a damn horror movie. “What the hell are you doing sitting in the fucking dark?” He looked over at me, his eyes basically dead.

“Where were you?” He asked again, staring down at me. I felt chills run down my back, his watching my every move, and not in the sexy way Negan did, but more of a ‘I’m afraid for my life right now’ way.

“I went out for a late snack with Mary.” I somewhat lied, shrugging. “I should be asking you where you were, not even letting me know where you went.” I slipped my shoes off at the door, walking back into the kitchen grabbing a glass of water. I heard him stand up from the couch, his footsteps dragging across the wooden floor. I rolled my eyes, taking a sip, knowing he was drunk. I glanced over at the entryway, Adam standing there, leaning against the wall.

“Where were you?” He asked again, his words slurring together. I sighed, setting down the cup.

“I told you. Me and Mary went to this diner, and just got something to eat, see?” I pointed to the box. “I didn’t eat a lot, I think my eyes were bigger than my stomach.” He stood there, staring at me, his brown hair a mess, his body slumped as he pushed himself off the wall.

“Where. Were. you?” He asked again, taking steps towards me. I grew weary, staring at him as he got closer and closer.

“Adam, honey, I told you where I was. I don’t know why you keep asking me- Adam!” I gasped, he reached for me, a hand wrapping around my upper arm, his fingers digging into the skin. “Adam, what the fuck are you doing?” I panicked, his hand squeezing around my arm. “You’re hurting me.” I winched, his hand wrinkling the fabric, my arm throbbing under his hold. He stared down at me, his blue eyes wide, looking over me. Without a word, he pushed me away. I grunted as my back hit the counter, my arm throbbing where he was once holding it. “What the fuck was that, Adam?” I yelled at him, the tears threatening to spill. He only shook his head, running a hand through his hair.

“I had too much to drink.” He mumbled, intertwining his hands behind his head, his elbows in the air. “The boys were cheering me on, making me take more shots.” He smirked, his mind going back to the bar I suppose. “And god damn, this one-” He stopped himself, his mind catching up to what he was saying. “Never mind, I’m going to bed.” He mumbled, swinging his hands down, turning his back to me. I heard his heavy footsteps going up the stairs, the door to our bedroom opening and shutting. I ran to the bathroom, turning the light on, unzipping my hoodie and grabbing the sleeve and tugging it down. I brushed against the bright red skin, pressing into it and watching the white skin turn back to it’s red color. I took a deep sigh, rubbing against the hot skin.

I shook my head, pulling up the sleeve. “He just had too much to drink.” I whispered. I left the bathroom, heading upstairs, seeing him already passed out on his side of the bed.

I sighed, going downstairs, sitting on the counter and opening up my takeout. I took a giant bite from the burger, the flavors instantly rushing over my tastebuds, flooding my mouth.

He was right, these were amazing.

***

“How was it last night?” Mary smiled, sitting on my couch with a wide smile. I rolled my eyes, sitting down with her, my knee up to my chest and my leg tucked under me.

“It was… something else.” I shrugged, taking a sip from my tea. “It didn’t go as I planned.”

“What do you mean?” She arched an eyebrow. I set my tea down, telling her everything. From the insane car sex, to my freak out in the diner and cutting the whole thing short. “You freaked out on him?”

“No.” I shook my head, “It all felt so much, and I felt like I was going to just explode. It almost felt like everything was crashing down on me.” She shook her head, sipping from her tea. “And I ran out, and he followed me, and I was just… yelling at him, and freaking out.”

“What did he do?”

“He kissed me.” She choked on her tea, setting down the cup.

“And did you punch him for thinking that was going to work.” I laughed at her.

“No, that’s the thing.” I whispered, thinking back to how I felt. “When he kissed me, it was like everything was just erased from my mind. I wasn’t worrying about Adam, or if someone caught us. It was like it was just me and Negan.”

“Y/N, you obviously have a connection with him.” Mary stated, giving me a serious look. “He kissed you and you felt fine, how do you explain that?” She asked me. I shrugged, grabbing my tea again. She stared at me, waiting for me to say something, if anything, she was looking for me to agree with her. “What are you thinking?”

“I’m thinking that I’m getting a little too personal with this messing around with him.” I blurted out. “That I’m thinking this is something more than what it is.”

“What if it is?” Mary asked, a raised eyebrow. “What if this is something more, and you’re not letting yourself enjoy it.” I rolled my eyes.

“I’m engaged, and I’m messing around with an older man.” I shook my head, my hair brushing my shoulders. “And we’re thinking that this is more than what me and Adam have?”

“Has Adam done that to you? When you freak out and he just has something that calms you down?” I shook my head at her, avoiding her eyes. “I think this is more than what you were hoping.”

“I’m not going to break an egagement and a 2 year relationship because he can fuck.��I bit back, my mind racing once again. “That’s not fair to Adam.”

“It’s not fair to him that you’re cheating in the first place.” I gasped at her, slapping her arm. She laughed at me, shrugging. “I’m right and you know it. If you really cared for Adam, and you had this strong feelings for him, you would’ve never slept with Negan. Let alone, twice.”

“I can’t do what you want Mary.” I huffed. “He probably think this is just a hit it and quit with me, he probably doesn’t want anything else. It’s safer for me to stay with Adam-”

“Than get your heart broken by that hunk?” She finished for me, a smirk on her lips.

“It’s two years that I’ve spent with something. I can’t throw that away because this man knows what he’s doing in the sheets.” Before Mary could reply, my phone vibrated against the coffee table, I leaned forward, seeing Negan’s name pop up. I launched for it, Mary watching me with a confused look as I swiped the message.

“Jesus, what did Adam want.” Mary rolled her eyes, taking a sip.

“It’s not Adam.” I whispered, reading the text. “It’s Negan.”

“What did he say?” She rushed, scooting over, shoulder to shoulder staring at the text message. “‘Hope you slept well, and I hope that burger didn’t go to waste.’ This man is obviously wanting more from you.”

“Shut up.” I laughed, staring down at the text. “What do I even say to that?”

“‘Hope you slept well too, that burger was almost as mind-blowing as that orgasm you gave me.’ How about that?” Mary winked.

“Be serious.” I huffed, biting the inside of my cheek thinking of something. “I shouldn’t reply.” I rushed, turning the phone off.

“Stop it.” Mary yelled, slapping my thigh. “You’re answering. Just say, ‘Hope you slept well too, and I promise, it didn’t.’” I thought about it for a second.

“Ok, I’m saying that.” Mary watched with excited eyes as I typed out the message, both of us watching closely for typos. I hit send quickly, going against everything in my mind telling me to just delete his number. I was about to shut my phone off, not expecting a text, but both me and Mary saw the bubble pop up, the three dots blinking. “Shut up.” I gasped. We both watched with wide eyes as he typed, the bubble staying, then leaving, but then coming back.

“He doesn’t know what to say to you.” Mary giggled, watching as the bubble kept going. We both gasped as a text was delivered.

‘Glad it didn’t.’

“That’s it?” Mary winched. “After all that typing, that’s what he says?”

“Stop it.” I laughed, my thumbs hovering over the keyboard. “What do I say? Should I apologize again about last night.” Mary shrugged, a single nod. “Ok how about, ‘Thanks again, and sorry for freaking out last night.’ Is that good?” Mary nodded again, watching as I typed it out, hitting send. We sat there, watching the messages, waiting. The bubble popped up, blinking at us as he watched.

“All he’s going to say is ‘ok’.” Mary joked, laughing at her own joke. I rolled my eyes, my phone vibrating in my hand.

‘You don’t need to apologize. I get it.’

My heart swelled, reading the text over. Before I could reply, another text came up.

‘I was serious last night, if this need to end, and just go back to people we used to know, then we will. Whatever you are comfortable with.’

“Shut up.” Mary gasped, reading the text again. “He’s really asking you about it, rather than being a dick?”

“What do I say?” I nervously asked, biting the inside of my lip.

“How about-”

“I’m going to say ‘I’m comfortable with you, we don’t have to do anything extreme.’ is that too much? Like too much feelings right off the bat?” I frantically asked, not even noticing I cut her off. She was surprised, seeing me like a teenager texting this man, so frantic and so nervous.

“Say it, if that’s how you feel.” She smiled, a sweet look on her face. I typed quickly, sending it and waiting there for another text. “You look excited.” Mary commented. I tried to play it off cool.

“It’s nothing.” I shrugged, going back to watching my phone, the bubble popped up again, then disappearing. “Ok, I said something wrong.” I mumbled, throwing my phone on my lap. “I obviously put too much feeling into it and now he thinks I’m crazy.” Mary rolled her eyes, and grabbed my phone. She looked at the message, turning it to show me.

‘How about coffee tonight?’ Everything in my body went hot, thinking about this.

“Is he asking you on a date?” Mary laughed, watching my reaction. I shrugged, grabbing my phone from her. “What are you going to say?” She watched, wide eyes.

“Should I be flirty and say, ‘Are you asking me on a date?’ like is that too much?”

“Fucking say it!” She pointed, a giant smile on her face. For a second, it felt like I wasn’t even engaged, just texting someone who was interested.

I typed out the message quickly, looking over it for a second then hitting send. We both sat there quietly, staring at the text message, waiting for the bubble. “What if he just ignores this? And just never talks to me again?”

“Then you get married.” Mary shrugged. I gave her a look of disbelief at her jokes, rolling my eyes. Within seconds my phone went off again, vibrating in my hand.

We both stared at the phone, looking at the text bubbles, waiting for a reply. “This was a mistake. I just know it.” I mumbled to myself, shaking my head. It was almost like we were watching a soap opera, both of us gasping as we saw the bubble come up, the three dots blinking.

‘How would you respond if I did?’ Both our mouths dropped reading his text, Mary slapping my arm.

“Y/N. This is fucking insane” She laughed. “I know I joke about it all the time, but this is fucking real, and I think you should go for it.” She was serious, nothing joking in her manners or anything as she told me what she thought.

“We’re just flirting.” I fought back weakly. “It’s nothing.” We both thought about it for a second, both of us knowing it was more than flirting. “What should I say?” I smiled. We thought for a moment. “How about, ‘You’ll find out at coffee.’? IS that too much?” She gave me a ‘do it’ look. I quickly typed out the text, hitting send and watching as the bubble popped up instantly.

‘Saint Peter’s Coffee Shop. See you at 8.’

***

“Where are you going again?” Adam asked, following me into the living room, watching as I grabbed my bag and keys.

“I told you, I’m meeting Mary for a coffee, just spending some time together.” I lied, surprised with how easily it slipped from my mouth. Adam stood there, his hands in his pockets as he watched me.

“How long are you going to be gone?” He asked, I gave him a weird look, grabbing my keys.

“I don’t know, maybe a couple hours. Mary likes to add other activities into our plans.” I shrugged, my hands began to sweat, from nerves of him asking too many questions, and the thought of seeing Negan once again. Adam nodded, coming up to me, he wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me closer to him. I gave him a sweet smile, ignoring the fact that my body was no longer welcoming his touch, forcing myself not to cringe as he looked down at me, a smirk on his lips. Adam was handsome, but not Negan handsome.

“Just don’t go too crazy.” He smiled, leaning down and placing a kiss on my lips. And again, I no longer felt as if I wanted his kisses, nor hands on me. I kissed back, pulling back with a smile.

“I won’t.” He nodded, letting go of me, watching as I turned and left. Last night, he didn’t remember anything that happened, calling me this morning asking where I was when he woke up, not remembering what he said or did a few hours before.

I rushed down the stairs, my keys jingling in my hand as I got to the first floor, practically running to my car. It felt like a blur as I drove to the small coffee shop, a place I haven’t heard before. But Negan swore on it, telling me it was the best coffee he had in awhile.

I followed the GPS, turning into a small coffee shop called ‘Saint Peter’s Coffee Shop’ lit with stings of lights hanging from light poles to light poles. I spotted Negan’s truck, parking a couple spots from his. I sat there in my car, taking deep breaths, calming myself as I turned my car off, texting Mary I’m here.

‘Be safe!’ I rolled my eyes, stepping out from the car. The small shop was cozy, an almost winter cabin vibe coming from it. The small bell rang as I opened the door, a few people scattered among the tables, talking to one another or simple enjoying the atmosphere.

“Y/N!” I turned, seeing Negan in a small corner booth, secluded from the rest of the people, a coffee in front of him. He slid from his seat, walking towards me with those long legs. “Glad you could make it.” He smirked, I blushed under his gaze, looking around the place again.

“It’s gorgeous here.” I smiled. “The coffee better be as good as you promised.” I joked. He chuckled with me.

“Let me buy you a coffee.” He smiled, leaning me to the counter.

“Just a mocha, please.” I told the worker, a younger teenager, who nervously typed on his register. Negan handed him his card, his eyes glancing at me here and there.

“It’ll be right out.” He smiled, handing the receipt to Negan. He nodded, gently pulling me with him to the booth.

I slid in, pushing my items to the end of the booth, feeling his eyes watching me the whole time. We sat there, letting the silence thicken between us. Not knowing who was going to talk first.

“I’m sorry.” I spoke quickly, breaking the tad bit of awkwardness. “For how I freaked out. I know I already apologized but it was uncalled for.”

“Y/N, you’re fine.” He told me, a sincere look in his eyes. I gave him a sweet smile, brushing back some hair.

“What brought you into teaching?”  I started.

And like that, we were in a rhythm. Taking and bantering back and forth. Getting to know one another more than just being fuck buddies. Telling one another about our teaching schedules, how tough the kids have been or what’s changed lately. It felt nice to talk to someone who understood. This definitely felt natural, almost like it was meant to be as we talked. What felt like 30 minutes turned into an hour and a half, staying behind while they closed shop.

“We should really get going.” I giggled, seeing the poor teenagers give us dirty looks, Negan glanced over at them. “We’re still here after they closed.” He nodded with me, standing up and fixing himself. I stood with him, grabbing my jacket. “I stood probably get back before Adam begins to wonder.” Negan shifted in his seat, slipping his hands into his pockets.

“Would you mind grabbing a drink?” I giggled, slipping the clothing on my arms.

“Didn’t we just do that?” I laughed. He raised an eyebrow, giving me a ‘you know what I mean’ look. I smiled, pulling my hair from in my coat. “And where would we get this drink?” I smiled again, he took a step closer, pinning me between his body and the table.

“How about my place?” He smirked. The small band wrapped around my left fingers began feeling hot, the metal basically burning into my fingers, begging me to say no.

“Sure.” I smiled, my heart thumping loudly against my chest. He gave me his signature smirk, that cocky look on his face. “I’ll just… follow you there?” I suggested, my hand going to my ring. I twisted it nervously around my finger, the band rubbing against the skin. He nodded to me, making his way towards the door. I grabbed my bag, nervously following him. I waved to the workers, a skip to my step as I ran out the door. I slipped the ring off as I hopped down the stairs, slipping it into my purse. Negan waited by his truck, watching as I slip in my car. He kept his eyes on me, starting my car. As he got into his car, I whipped my phone out, shooting a quick text to Mary.

***

“Mary, I am parked outside his house, and I want you to know if this whole charming, gorgeous man thing is an act, and I die, I want you to know, this is the way I wanted to go.” I rushed out, watching as Negan pulled into his garage.

“Y/N, shut the fuck up.” She laughed, “Send me your location just in case something does happen, okay?”

“I will Mary.” I laughed, watching as Negan stepped out of his truck, looking over at me. “I have to go. I’ll let you know.” I rushed, saying a quick bye, stumbling out of the car. He watched me fix myself, walking up his driveway, his lean hips leaning against his truck, hands in his pockets, watching me with an amused look. “Gorgeous place.” I smiled, stepping in. He smiled, going up the small steps, hitting the garage door button. I followed him into his home, sudden nerves running up my body.

I was surprised as he turned the lights on, the home together and neat. There wasn’t hardly any clutter, the shelves put together nicely, the home almost the opposite of what I would've imagined. A few hurried clicks came from upstairs the hurried clicks turning into soft thuds. I opened my mouth ready to ask what that was when I saw a giant rottweiler rushing down the stairs. I watched as it ran at Negan, jumping and panting as it wiggled in Negan’s arms. He laughed loudly, his hands roughly scratching at the dog’s head, talking to the dog in an airy, light voice.

“Hey Bear!” He laughed, getting down onto his knees, the dog wiggling its butt as he licked at Negan’s face. I watched with an amused smile, a whole new look of who this man was, was shining at me.

“He loves you.” I laughed. At the sound of a new voice, the dog pulled from Negan, his eyes set on me. My eyes widen as the excited dog ran at me, jumping up quickly. I laughed loudly as the dog pushed me against the door, licking at my face excitedly. I laughed and laughed, turning my head to the side, Bear following and licking at my face as I pulled away from him. “Bear!” I giggled.

“Bear, get off of her!” Negan called, reaching for Bear’s collar, tugging him from me. I kept laughing, pushing off Bear off gently.

“He’s so friendly.” I laughed again, Negan pulling away Bear, shaking with excitement.

“I’m so sorry.” He chuckled, guiding Bear away from me. “Wanna go out?” He asked Bear. The dog’s head tilted to the side, slipping from Negan��s now loose grip, running to the back. “I’m going to let him out.” He smiled at me, hands on his hips. “Make yourself comfortable.” He gestured towards the couch. I nodded, giggling as I heard Bear bark, Negan sighing and walking towards the back. I slipped my jacket off, laying across the back of one of his chairs, setting my bag on top of it. I heard the back door slid open, the dog barking excitedly as it ran outside.

I stepped on the back of my shoes, slipping it off and doing the same with my other one, sitting down on my right leg on the couch, my left knee raise to my chest. I waited patiently, listening to Negan call for Bear, the big pup scurrying into the house, running back towards the living room. I laughed loudly as he jumped onto the couch, instantly throwing himself at me, licking at my face again. “Bear.” I laughed, my arm wrapped around his body, scratching at his side. “Stop. Stop.” I giggled, the dog calming down just a tad, laying his head on my chest, huffing loudly as I scratched his side. “He’s so sweet.”

“He’s a big baby.” Negan laughed, coming up from behind the couch, I leaned my head back, looking up at him, his hands holding himself on the couch, looking down at me.

“He’s a sweetheart.” I whispered to him, a smile on my face, looking up at the older man. He stared down at me, a strange look on his face. “What?” I whispered, staring back up. I watched as he leaned down. My breath caught in my throat as he got closer, his lips meeting mine softly. A real old-fashioned Spiderman kiss.I moaned softly, leaning up into the kiss. He pulled away at the last second, a teasing smirk on his face.

Bear whined against me, wanting my attention back on him. “What do you want to drink?” Negan smiled, walking around from the couch, heading into the kitchen.

“Whatever you got.” I smiled, scratching at the giant goofball. The glasses hitting together, his footsteps coming to the living room. He walked in with a smile on his face, a glass in each hand.

“Whisky.” He smiled, settling himself onto the couch, handing me a cup. I sipped the whiskey, burning as it flowed down, warming me up. He stared at me, slowly sipping, licking his lips after every drink. This would’ve been one of those sexy movie moments were we stared at one another, letting our eyes tell one another how much we wanted each other. Yet, Bear was throwing himself into the situation, whining and crying when I would stop.

“How long have you had him?” Bear tilted his head, looking up at me, his tongue sticking out from his mouth. “You’re such a cutie.” I scratched at his face.

“Got him when he was a puppy, about 5 years now.” He told me, throwing his arm over the back of the couch, watching me as I stared down at Bear. I leaned forward, placing the glass on his coffee table, the heavy dog moving with me. I settled back onto the couch, using both my hands, scratching at this giant baby. “Do you mind me asking?” He asked. I looked up at him, his eyes glancing at my left hand.

“I just… took it off.” I shrugged, thinking back to that ring in my purse. I stopped petting Bear, the big goof staring up at me, his paws kicking the air, whining at me. “My hands are getting tired.” I giggled to him. After a few moments, he stopped, turning to look at me. He huffed, picking himself up and walking away. I watched as he walked across the living room, stepping onto his bed, turning in circles until he flopped down. “What are you expecting from this?” I blurted out, looking back at Negan.

“Of what?” He simply asked. I chuckled, shaking my head.

“From me.” I stated. He gave me a weird look, before realizing what I meant.

“I told you that first time, in the bathroom.” He smirked, setting down his glass next to mine. He stood up, looking down at me. He slipped off his jacket, throwing it on the couch, holding a hand out for me. Without any hesitation, I placed my hand in his. He pulled me up, bringing me to him. He held my hand, wrapping his arm around my waist, keeping me to him. I placed a hand on his chest, his body swaying us. I giggled as he swaying the both of us, moving to a music only we could hear. “I’ve wanted you the second I saw you at that school.” He whispered to me.

“You’re just wanting me here for my body then?” I joked, tilting my head to the side. He shook his head, a smile on his lips.  

“Well that body for one.” He let out a low whistle, taking a step back and looking me over. I blushed under his gaze, pulling him back to me. “You’re so much more than that.” He whispered to me. “The fact that I’ve gotten to hit this a couple times, only makes it better.” I slapped his chest, rolling my eyes at his boldness. “What are you wanting from this?” He asked me, staring down at me, genuinely wanting to know.

“I don’t know.” I told him, trying to rack my brain for a better answer. “When I saw you at that bar, I don’t know what I went to the bathroom.” I told him honestly. He stopped swaying looking down at me. “I just did, and I wasn’t expecting you to follow.” He gave me a strange look, his eyebrows furrowed together. I could tell he was thinking. “But I don’t regret it.” I added. “I don’t regret any second that I’m with you.”

It felt like time and space froze as we looked at one another, our eyes searching one another, looking for something to stop us from doing something that makes this situation even worse. But there was no convincing each other as he tightened his arm around my waist, pulling me closer to him, our lips colliding.

And in a snap, I was in his arms, my arms wrapped around his neck once again, our lips moving in a frenzy, wanting and begging for each other. His arms traveled down, his hands grabbing the back of my thighs, lifting me up, my legs wrapping around his hips. He walked with me in his arms, going up the steps, our lips never leaving one another as he pressed me against the wall. I gasped as he held me up, his hands grabbing at my shirt, ripping it in half. I watched in pure lust as the fabric ripped like paper in his hands, the material flimsily falling around my arms. I let the fabric fall, pushing my chest out, Negan reaching behind me and unclasping my bra, throwing it on the stairs as the cool breeze hit my sensitive nipples.

“You’re gorgeous.” He whispered, looking me over. I tried my best to not blush, to not cover myself as he stared at me. Of course, we’ve fucked before, but we haven’t seen one another completely naked.

“Shut up and fuck me.” I moaned, grabbing the back of his head, pulling him down to me. It was a mess of clothes flying, our warmed skin touching one another finally as he carried me to his bed, throwing me down. I bounced back, a smile on my face, giggles leaving my mouth as he growled playfully, tugging on my pants and underwear. Not bothering to savor the moment, only bothering to get each of us as naked as we could be.

He flung my pants across the room, standing above me, looking down at me, completely exposed for him. “If you keep staring, I’m gonna have to get my clothes back on.” I winked.

“Don’t you fucking dare.” He smirked. I sat up, biting down on my bottom lip, working on his belt. He watched me, his chest rising and falling, watching as I undid his belt, tugging on the button and pulling on the zipper, pulling it slowly. Letting the sound ringing between us, teasing the both of us. I hooked my fingers into the loops of his pants, tugging them down with his boxer, my mouth drooling at the sight before me. I was always surprised seeing how well endowed he was. He quickly kicked off the jeans and boxers, crossing his arms and throwing the shirt across the room. I leaned back, staring up at him, taking his naked form in, memorizing it. “Take a picture, it’ll last longer.” He winked.

“Maybe I will.” He raised an eyebrow at that, a smug grin forming on his lips.

“Is that what you’re into?” He smirked, bending down, placing a knee on the edge of the bed, basically crawling towards me.

“Into what?” I innocently asked, my heart ready to pound out of my chest as he stopped at my legs, staring at me.

“You’re into getting filmed, aren’t you?” I blushed, not really knowing if I was. The thought of Negan staring down at me, camera in his hand, filming us doing unspeakable things, only make me clench.

“I’m not sure.” I told him, feeling sheepish. “But I don’t mind finding out with you.” He smiled, staring at me like he was the big bad wolf, and I was his little red riding hood.

He pounced on me, grabbing my thighs, pulling me closer to him, lifting my thighs high, spreading me for him. I was basically bent in half as he leaned back on his legs, looking down at me spread for him. He grabbed his swollen cock, slapping it against my cunt as he stared down at the both of us, watching as he rubbed himself along my soaked folds. I was completely at his mercy, and I wouldn’t want it any other way.

He slipped himself into me, my jaw dropping as he stretched me open, his face scrunching as I squeezed him, his cock stretching me, the slight discomfort of how big he was only added to every single second.

He gave me no time to adjust, simply holding my thighs, and began thrusting with all his might. I was a whimpering moaning mess under him, grabbing at his wrist, begging for him to not stop as he continued to ruin me. Holding my legs open, stretching me to the max as he used me for his pleasure. “Look at you taking it like a good girl.” He praised.

He wrapped his arms around my body, lifting me up into his lap. I grabbed onto him, sitting on his lap, his cock drilling  the sharp tug I felt in my heart as we stared at one another.

He slipped in deeper as I sat on him, his hands gripping at my back, keeping me to him as he moved together. I sat higher on him, my arms wrapped around his neck, staring at one another as he moved. It was all so much, the feeling of him filling me up again, the feeling of my release building in the pit of my stomach, it all felt so personal, so quick, and so… passionate.

We held onto one another, moving together, his cock slipping from me, and immediately returning to its rightful place. Our chest pressed together, one hand digging into my back, holding me to him, his other hand grabbing my shoulder, helping me come down even harder on him. We were a moaning mess, our whimpers and moans mixing, sweat collecting on each other.

“Don’t stop.” I whimpered, looking down at him. His pupils were blown with lust, his hair disheveled, his eyebrows furrowed and lips parted. He looked absolutely sinful.

“I’m not going to stop.” He whispered back to me, groaned as I clenched around him, dropping his head onto my chest. I snaked my hands into his soaked hair, holding on as his forehead brushed against my hot chest, grounding myself and bringing myself harder on him. “Fuck.” He groaned into my chest, his hands tightening on my body. I didn’t even realize my eyes were shut, the pleasure taking over my body, my mind a blank as we moved.

His hand cupped my face, moving my head to look down at him. I’m sure I looked crazy, if anything, I looked like I belonged in a damn porno.

“You’re fucking gorgeous.” He whispered to me, gasping as I clenched around him again. All the emotions built again, everything crashing on me, and all I could do was kiss him. The welcoming feeling of my climax was ready to pour out of me, threatening to spill as I rode him.  “Let me fill this cunt up.” He whispered against my lips. “I want to see you filled with my cum.” With a hard nod, Negan dropped me on my back, a grunt leaving my lips as he grabbed my thighs, pulling me closer to him, my legs spread wide open for him, a slight burn on my inside thigh as he spread me wider, filling me up again. In no time, he was pounding into me, pornographic moans and groans leaving our lips as he held me down by my hips, staring down as he fucked me.

“I’m- I’m-” I gasped, feeling everything in my body tense, the body shaking orgasm running through my body as he picked up his pace, slamming into me harder, his pubic bone hitting my clit perfect each time, my legs shaking against him. “Fuck, Negan.” I yelled, throwing my head back, clenching around him, my hands grabbing his wrist as I came around him, my hips bucking against his hands as he held me down.

“Fuck fuck fuck.” he repeated, his hips slamming against me once, then twice, stilling against me as his cock twitched in me, thick ropes of cum filling me. “Holy fuck.” He growled, giving me a hard thrust as he let everything wash over himself, pumping himself dry in me.

He fell against me, holding himself up by his forearms, his head resting against my shoulder.

I don’t know how he felt, but I knew I was a giddy mess, a loopy smile on my face, my eyes hooded, a tired but relaxed look over my face. Negan looked up at me, noticing the look, a smile on his face. “What’s so funny.” He whispered, watching as I shook my head, a few giggles leaving my mouth.

“I just… feel great.” I smiled, watching as he shook his head, lifting himself off of me. The smile was wiped with a gasp as I felt him slip from me, his cum slowly leaking out of me. I groaned as I dropped my legs, sitting up. Negan pulled his pants up, looking at me. “What?” I smiled, feeling a bit self conscious.

He smirked, shaking his head and heading to his bathroom. He grabbed a towel, coming back to me. With no words, he helped me clean up, his hands gentle as he cleaned me, the soft towel brushing against my sore core. He helped me up, grabbing my underwear, throwing them at me, grabbing his shirt as well and tossing it at me. It was a comfortable silence as I slipped the clothes on.

As much as I loved feeling that this was normal, and that this was something that I could get used to, reality hit both of us the second we heard my phone vibrating. The relaxed smile fell from my lips as Negan reached down, slipping my phone from my pants back pocket.

“It’s Adam.”

~~~~~

Tag list

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[ofaylin]

⌠ BAHAR SAHIN, 19 CISFEMALE, SHE/HER ⌡ welcome back to gallagher academy, AYLIN KALELI! according to their records, they’re a SECOND year, specializing in LINGUISTICS, CULTURE, & ASSIMILATION; and they DID go to a spy prep high school. when i see them walking around in the halls, i usually see a flash of (hair pulled back with a chanel ribbon, lycra boots with razor blades in the heel, champagne and french macarons in a bubble bath, wiping your tears with a $100 bill). when it’s the (leo)’s birthday on 8/3/00 they always request their FRENCH FRIES from the school’s chefs. looks like they’re well on their way to graduation. 

hi, hello, i’ve been sitting on this idea for a while and i was going to wait until june but with all these new characters i just got too excited ?! so, fuck it, i’m here now, i can’t help myself. for plots, feel free to message me here on tumblr or hmu on discord @ #kati7600, but check out her intro below the cut ! // ty @gallagherintro​

INSPIRATION.

bex baxter – gallagher girls

carmen cortez – spy kids

blair waldorf – gossip girl

cher horowitz – clueless

torrance shipman – bring it on

jackie burkhart – that 70s show

BACKGROUND.

both of her parents work for the national intelligence organization of turkey, they’re big shots and they make a lot of money! she has two older sisters and she’s born into a world of wealth and expectations. it won’t take her long to learn more languages than years she has lived, and waking up early to run drills and do obstacle courses with her sisters is routine.

picture perfect on the outside, the household within goes through turmoil. her mother is promoted to the director of the NIO and it puts a strain on her parent’s relationship. her father starts taking more business trips, and aylin and her sisters spend nights sitting on the top of the stairs, listening in on phone conversations. aylin’s the youngest, so she doesn’t really understand what’s going on and needs to have it broken down. 

aylin had always LOVED her parent’s love story – they met on a mission and they were partners for years, it’s all very romantic. so the divorce leaves her confused. how could you stop loving someone? how could you just give up?

both of her parents are an active part of her life, the divorce is...fairly amicable and they share custody. the only thing aylin doesn’t like is her father’s new girlfriend, young and totally uninvolved in the world of espionage. the girl could be her sister. aylin spends her time split between two houses, half-belonging to each, but her parents feel GUILTY so aylin quickly learns how to use that guilt to get what she wants, whether it’s freedom or material goods. 

she’s a little spoiled, but it doesn’t satisfy her. nothing really does, it just makes her feel sort of empty, so she works harder, filling time with books and training with her older sisters who tell her cool stories from their spy prep schools and teach aylin things they’ve learned when they come home for breaks. aylin long for the day when she’s not splitting your time between other people’s homes and she’s in a place that she can really call her own.

she goes to the same spy prep school that her older sisters did in london. she’s competitive from the get-go because she’s a kelali and people already expect things from her to begin with. she smiles when people call her by her sister’s name or mention her mother, but inside she’s seething, eager to prove that she’s good because she works hard, not because she’s someone’s sister or daughter.

it’d be a lie to say that aylin didn’t step on a few toes, and the way she skyrocket to valedictorian is a little less than savory – she reports her competition for illicit activities, and...perhaps she planted something in their locker idk!!! 

she has her pick of spy prep colleges across the nation, but her mom really encourages her to choose gallagher. why? that’s weird, her mom never went there and neither does the rest of her family! but aylin really likes the idea of a place that’s all hers and she’s always wanted to see america, so she chooses it. she’s a bit smug about being ahead of others because she’s been reading books on espionage since age 4, and if you don’t know sixteen languages, stay out of her way. 

PERSONALITY:

PROUD. aylin is a very proud person, she grew up in an affluent household with important parents. when faced with a challenge, it’s her pride that tends to motivate her to be the best because she feels like she has something to prove, and she’ll turn her nose up at you until she gets it. this also makes her stubborn.

INTELLIGENT. aylin was raised in an environment where she was being trained since her childhood, knowing about espionage since she could speak, but she also has an iq of 122, so not quite genius level but she’s getting there. she’s the head cheerleader type that you’d be surprised is actually really good at math.

HARD-WORKING. queen of taking on too many extracurriculars at all times! honestly she tends to overexert herself until she burns out, but she wants it all – the exciting social life, the straight As, the meaningful connections, the parties, when does she sleep? maybe never.

SNOBBISH. honestly, she doesn’t mean to come off as a snob but she definitely does because she hasn’t really known anything other than crystal dishware and fancy clothes. she doesn’t even comprehend that other people don’t come from the same place of privilege that she has.

FUN-LOVING. the girl you want to party with! just because she’s a good student, she wouldn’t want you to think that she doesn’t know how to have a good time. aylin operates in extremes, so she parties just as hard as she studies and has a tendency to get carried away, but let it be known that she’s doing this for herself and not for anyone else’s attention.

MANIPULATIVE. aylin will step on toes to get what she wants, and she’s not scared to fight dirty. she tends to stay in the lines of what’s legal of course, but if she sees a window into getting what she wants, she’ll say what she needs to in order to get it. honestly, she can be a bit callous with the way she uses people and doesn’t always understand the effects of her actions. she would tell you that the ends justify the means. yikes.

INDEPENDENT. doesn’t need you or anyone else and wants you to know it. her confidence is genuine and real, and she doesn’t attribute any of her accomplishments to her family name – she’s not insecure about it, she knows that she’s good at what she does.  

HEADCANONS.

started school early, so she’s a bit young for her grade by a year. she sees this as a positive thing and will brag to you about how she’s younger AND smarter. annoying.

acts like she really likes healthy food and eats a salad in public ( will tell you that’s her favorite food ) but she’s weak for things that are greasy and fried and will be pigging out in secret. her favorite food is french fries but you probably wouldn’t guess that about her ! 

languages she knows: english, french, turkish, arabic, german, kurmanji, italian, dutch, spanish, mandarin, japanese, latin, hindustani, malay, russian, bengali. some are better than others and some she reads more than she can really speak. 

taught herself to skateboard since coming to america since it seemed like the thing to do based on watching american films. she will ride her little penny board in high heels and loves it ! and you thought i couldn’t make her more annoying !

tons of expensive lingerie but u can look but don’t touch. 

bisexual but still not interested in you. 

leo with a virgo rising and cancer moon. i am so SORRY ! 

WANTED CONNECTIONS. 

SERENA TO HER BLAIR. literally her best friend ever, but they probably have a sort of on-off friendship because they’re strong personalities and get in each other’s business. however, when it comes down to it, they’ll always put the other first and they love each other immensely, would kill a man for the other. but they’re also pretty competitive too. 

GIRL SQUAD. i just want her to have a couple close girl friends that are all close...you know. i would love if one of them was more subdued and totally chill about everything, maybe a wallflower type, and then another that’s kind of nerdy ? but also cool, you know. i’m just dreaming. 

EX/BESTIE. aylin and this person used to date like forever ago, but mutually decided that they made better friends than romantic partners. they care about each other a lot, and they probably make jokes about how they USED to date. a healthy ex connection basically !

ON/OFF THING. because for every healthy ex i also want something kind of toxic. essentially it’s not good for either of them and they just keep going back to each other because, well, it’s a place of comfort or whatever. they drive each other fucking crazy though and no one can keep up with whether they hate each other’s guts today or if they’re all heart eyes.

SWORN ENEMY. but for a justified reason, like aylin probably screwed them over for something academic or even in a campus club or something. if your character went to a spy prep school, maybe they’re the person that aylin screwed out of the valedictorian role ? might submit a WC for that cause. fun.  

PROJECT. like my fair lady, be aylin’s eliza doolittle, let her she’s the man you, whatever. essentially, your character might by shy, nervous, or new to the spy world and aylin wants to give them a metaphoric ( or maybe even physical ! ) makeover and help them get acclimated, teach them the ways of the world. i’m also picturing that pic of the lesbians, u know what i mean. i can’t find it, but i google searched “girl doing the other girls makeup, gay” 

FORBIDDEN FRIENDSHIPS/LOVE. idk something totally not allowed. if this was sooner i’d want her ass to have a crush on a witness protection kid. however, her parents work for the turkish NIO, so perhaps your muse’s parents or family have been involved in something rivaling that so they’re not supposed to get along. 

MARRIED COUPLE FRIENDS. these are friends that are so close that they’re practically a married couple?? i’d love to do a platonic m/f thing with this, where they fight and get on to each other like they’re married but love each other like it too. lil grandparents of their friend group.

CRUSHER. someone who has a crush on her, probably because they’re fascinated with the idea of her and not her true problematic self. she’d probably be kinda rude to them and i’d love to plot this out long enough for that crush to turn to dislike once they recognize the selfish parts of her or notice she’s been making fun of them. maybe a flipped scenario.

ONE NIGHT STAND. maybe after a few too many drinks, they hooked up. something recent so we can make it super awkward and potentially funny. 

SET-UP. your character’s parents are close friend’s with aylin’s and they’re trying to set aylin up with your character. aylin and your character are NOT compatible at all and it’s hilarious. 

OVERSEAS. they met while they were both abroad together one summer, and they accidentally got into some trouble with international police maybe just for being too drunk on the streets or acting stupid, climbing stuff. aylin considers your character a liability and has avoided them since, disregarding the fun times they had.

RIVALS/ENEMIES WITH SEXUAL TENSION.

EXISTING CONNECTIONS.

NAZ FARHI. her cousin. the two of them don’t NOT get along...but aylin really thought she would come to a school and be the only one of her family members there and then naz showed up ! determined to make it clear that she’s the best. 

JO TRAN. rival/dislike. took one of the upper-level courses because she could and her attitude got on jo’s nerves because what doesn’t get on jo’s nerves. aylin’s just the epitome of everything that pisses jo off. 

KASSANDRA SUTTON. bad friend to. one of those friendships where one person takes more than they give, and it’s not ON PURPOSE, but kass is really just so easy to take advantage of, aylin’s ALWAYS running to her when she needs a favor. 

[ain-t-bovvered]

14x11 Commentary (special)

Special episode where a bunch of tired and caffeinated Europeans ( plus a sleepy American) scream together, and then die and try to get on with their day ( lol AS IF)

Hello and welcome:

@purpleskiesandcherrypies  (Nat)

@dean-winchesters-bacon  (Kat)

@waywardbaby  (Zee)

@ain-t-bovvered  (Giu)

1 2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10

14x11 Damaged Gods

Giu: Ugh fuck off nick

Zee: I’m the cage

Nat: bleugh

Giu : Pardon me but M losing it, is kinky

Giu: I wanna know whats in that fucking book tho

Kat: So kinky

-Nick being an idiot sandwich

Zee: So sick of Nick

Nat : so Nick is hunting now

-Demon scum: Never been caught by a human.

-I wouldn’t call Nick a human at this point honestly.

Giu: Also how did he got hold of an angel blade, Like seriously ..... Tfw 2.0 sucks at keeping “prisoners”

Nick : Abraxas.

Oooooh my god that again. I get that he has nothing left to do, but still.

Zee: She ded

- Nick:” I don’t know, where’s the fun in that?” (about letting the demon go)

 *MMBLEGH ! STABS EYE*

[looks in the camera like in the office]

Nat: omg

- Welp that was violent.

- “Maria Prophetissima, Historia Achengeli.” Trying really hard to think that’s not supposed to be italian......because I’d have some complaints.

Giu : RED SHIRT

Zee: Giuls do I need to say it?

Nat: THE RED SHIRT OF SEX

Kat: Barely alive

- LEATHER GLOOOOOVES. YAAAAAS. also....Dean....what the fuck are you thinking uh? Ooooooh right the welding episode

Nat: Oh.. here comes the heart break

Giu: All the fucking hurt.

-Sam: “How are you feeling”

-Dean, completely dribbling around that question like a champ “Whatcha reading?”

- Sam : “We’ll find a way “  ( #369)

- Dean: “Actually I wanna go for a drive”

uh uh Don’t like the sound of that.

Zee: Always in need of his mom

- Dean : “One-on-one time with mom”

Giu : DO NOT LIKE

Kat: Sam fucking face

-Sam is us.

-Sam: “Whatever you need”

- Fuck you Dean. Don’t look like you are almost crying...fuck you

Nat: OMG THE HUG

-dEAN FUCKING FACE, DEAN FUCKING HESITANT HAND WHAT THE FUCK

Zee: Take care Sammy?

Giu : AAAAAAH THE FUCK. NO

-Sam startled face tho.

- HE KNOWS SOMETHING IS UP

Giu: THE FUCK CABIN

Zee: Still don’t like Mary, I always think she doesn’t give a fuck

- Mary: “I’ll take any excuse for a visit”

THEN WHY DON’T YOU FUCKING VISIT . YOU KNOW WHAT’S UP . THE FUCK.

Kat: She’s the worst

Nat : Sammy calls up his mom to tell her about THE HUG

Giu : “That’s sweet” WOW. BITCH HE HAS THE ARCHANGEL MICHAEL STOMPING ABOUT IN HIS MIND. 

- Sam: “ We don’t hug” .... well...only if it’s literally the end of the world.  SO HEALTHY.

Mary : “We have to respect that” 

 fuck oOOOOOFF you are his mom you don’t have to respect shit when your son has an archangel in his mind.

-Sam paranoia rising up because some books are missing.

-Ok but I love this shot, it’s so pretty.

[Food Splatter] Dean: “OH MY GOd”

-Oh my god indeed

Zee & Nat : DONNAAAAAA

- She’s so pretty!!! I love her so much.

[Dean licking his finger] ..... DOOOON’T STAPH IT

Nat : Dean has a big mouth

Giu: KINK!

Zee : Nat really…

Nat : have you seen the bite he took?!

Giu: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

- The place is called “The hungry beaver” 

yeah ok come on.

- AAAAh so great to hear from the girls tho.

Also Dean’s avoiding all the questions he knows that are coming like a pro Winchester.

- Donna: “Last month, we took down a Vetala nest”

Dean’s impressed face.

- Dean:” Get out of town......Good for her”

- Awww the question about Dough tho. He’s avoiding questions ok but he’s so cute asking about that

Zee & Nat : Freaking news letter

Giu : I swear they have a what’s up chat like us.

Kat : No doubt

- Lol also I think Jensen has a runny nose while shooting these scene, lol the tissue.

- Dean: “ - without seeing my D-Train”

Nat: SO DEAN'S A HUGGER NOW

Kat: farewell tour

Giu : OH SHUT UP WHAT IS THIS NOW?!? THE MEMORY LANE BEFORE TUNING OUT? DEAN!

- HIS FUCKING FACE SHUT THE FUCK UP I CAN’T

-God do I ship them tho. I need some DonnaxDean asap ok ( tag me people)

Nat : I hate this so much. Can I burn this episode already?

Giu: Yes *hands the matches*

- way to ruin perfectly good pumpkins Mary . I guess you wouldn’t know what to do with them anyway....like....idk....pumpkin pie or some shit for your son....who loves pies....remember.....whatever I don’t even know why I’m trying anymore.

Nat : "We could call Sam over" and have a freaking party

- Dean: “I don’t wanna Sam here”

- RUDE

Giu: “EVerYtHinG aLrIghT?”

- Dean: “ I’m HANGRY “ lol 

Giu: Not much of a cook

Zee: You’re not much of an anything

Giu: WELL NOT SHIT

- WINCHESTER SURPRISE . THE FUCK IS THAAAAAT

- Mary :”I can’t believe you remember that”

- I can’t believe you remember you have kids.

Nat: YOU CAN'T REMEMBER A LOT OF THINGS BITCH. DEAN REMEMBERS EVERYTHING, ALRIGHT.

Kat: He really does

Nat: Can I cry now

Giu: MY HEART IS POUNDING

Zee: ...in my ears

- Dean: “Delicious heart-attack on a plate. I would like mine with extra cheese”

- Extra cheese horny face

- ...AND PIE!

-The P O S T E R S

Giu: OMFG..... I’m already dreading the meta on that poster

 ( in a positive way  ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)  )

- [ M still trashing around ]

Kat: This song. Damn it

- *The Guess Who’s “No Time” playing*

Giu: OH COME ON, A LEATHER APRON, AND LEATHER GLOVES.

Zee: Fuck me sideways

Kat : All the damn ways

Nat: I AM AROUSED . IN THE MORNING. WHY AM I AROUSED (08:46 a.m )

- “I found myself some wings”  

Are *claps* you *claps* fucking *claps* kiddin’ *claps* me?

-when he tilt his head to make the mask falls down.

- the jacket popped collar....YAAAS

Giu: Fucking hell.

- I can’t deal with that poster and the sparks....I CAN’T

I CAAAAAAN’T

Nat: EVEN HIS LEGS ARE SEXY…..OK BUT FUCK ME

Giu: NO FUCK ME

Kat: HE’S THE ENERGIZER BUNNY HE CAN FUCK US ALL

Kat: SO MUCH WELDER!DEAN

Zee: Somebody write that shit

- And tag us thank

Giu: “ that’s new...YOU BUYING FOOD” wow…...WOOOOW. How the fuck does she live.

- whiskey, pumpkins and crosswords puzzles. WOW Mary living the life.

*Nick appears*

Giu & Nat : NO

Zee: Oh hello

Giu &Nat : FUCK OFF

- Nick: “Thanks for nothing , pal”

well Nick...ya creepy van doesn’t really scream FRIENDLY NEIGHBOR FORMER SATAN

Nat: Oh, Donna's going to show up

Zee: My girl stepping in

Kat: THIS BITCH BETTER NOT TOUCH MY GIRL…..Why am I yelling, I already know what happens

Giu: *john’s Mulaney Trump voice* OH IF HE SO MUCH TOUCH ONE FUCKING HAIR ON HER. I want him to do it , I want- I dare him to do it, I fucking swear , I’m fucking crazy.

- Nick picking up the clip.... * STREET SMARTS*

- Don’t- don’t try to outsmart my girl , it’s pathetic

- Donna:”What’s your name”

  Nick: “Nunya” 

oh....OH WOW do ya want to make the nun ya business joke to Donna...? WOW

 Nick: “ First name: eat. Last name: Me”

Oh wow that’s- that’s just sad.

Zee: Can I say that I love her pushing him like that?

Giu: OOFTA

Nat: of course this happens

Giu: YASP ( YAS + GASP )

Kat&Zee&Nat : NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Nat: Just how long had Mary been away that it's already so late

Giu: She needed to remember how food work

- Mary smile is the only thing we have in common right now

Nat: That SMILE

Giu: Dean is the better mom. LOOK AT HIM. DOMESTIC NESTING DEAN KINK!

Zee: Oven mittens. Ya think?

Nat: "Something is going on" YA THINK?

- Sam is already on his way , no surprises there.

- Dean: “ he’s soaking wet, he’s pulling bologna, and sliced cheese out of his pants. So me, being the big brother, I’m the cook. I took all that bologna, all that sliced cheese and I put it onto a hot plate.It stunk up that room so bad. Dad comes home and he’s so mad, he picks up everything, chunks it into the trash, probably remained him of you....”

Giu: JOHN A + parenting, but also....I love the glimpses on their past, I really do.

Giu: What he made?

Nat: the winchester special? winchester surprise

Giu:Looks nasty..... I WANT IT 

- Mary trying to talk about how much she had missed.... yeah yeah you were dead it’s not that it’s your fault. 

- AND HERE ...look I don’t like Mary but Samantha did an amazing job, like....good lord

- Dean:”But you are here now”.

....well....in the fuck cabin , yes she is.

- Dean: “ Mom that meant everything to me” 

- Dean: “ There is no clouds on the horizon”  fucKING LIAR

*SOBS*

- Mary:”Whatever you are going through , you can talk to me”

Dean : *DIMPLES OF DISCONTENT* 

Zee: I don’t wanna talk about it

Giu: Please

- The Winchester motto

Dean *snores*

us : AAAAAAAAAAAW PRECIOUS

- I’m mary’s face 

Nat: She didn't even offer him a bed tho

Giu: I don’t think Dean wanted the fuck bed tho

-Mary snooping around, yes thank you, do something right.

- Mary: “Oh..no...no no no “ WHAAAAAAT

Dean smacking mouth while sleeping is giving me ex ptsd

Giu: OH FUCK PFF

Kat: Freaking creep

Giu: My cereal are soggy af. I can’t even eat. Also....WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT DISGUSTING LAMP.

- This shot is beautifuuuuul 

- [ 007 theme music plays ]

Nat: SAMMEEHHHHH

- Sam: “Hey Woah EASY”

Giu: CREEPY RAPE VAN

Zee: Come in. I’ve got candy

- Of course the demons keep track of the Winchesters. Are you kidding? they need to get the fuck out before they get to them lol, pussies.

Giu: “Nick what are u doing” ….we are whispering that since day fucking 1

Nat: Can we just burn that van? with them inside?

Kat: As long as they’re both in it

Nat: Dean'd hate us tho

Giu: ooooh he’ll get over it , *bad italo-american accent*  don’t worry about it

- Mary:” You could’ve just ask me” 

she’s not wrong.

- Mary : I took a demon and put it in a box and then I put that box into another box and then I put that box into a bigger box and then-

HONESTLY WHAT THE FUCK OK.

Giu: I swear Nick’s story is stale af. Like...Mark is soooo good and he’s the reason lucifer arch stayed that long , i’m sad if he go out spn but lucifer needs to end.

Nat: Mark is really good tho, But yes, it's enough.  Sam's hair is fucking great.

Zee: True story

- Can Sam stop taking blame for other people bullshit already?

- oooh a storage room with traps like John

- Well that was a weak ass locket

- Mary’s storage : A pickled head, some creepy ass doll, mother instincts, a powerful demon trapped inside an enochian box.

Giu: Ok but...honestly who fucking cares tho...just give him the damn demon so he can fuck off. And shut the fuck up the both of ya.

Kat: Okay but if he’d just think about the answer to his question it’s so fucking obvious

Zee: A demon needs a host

Giu: put it in a fucking mice whatever

- Dean: “ Nick is not a project. He’s not a freaking puppet “

WE’VE BEEN KNEW

- Sam: “Since when do we give up on people?”  aaaw Sam never did but Dean needs to be there to balance ok. And anyway they saved Jack so , but yeah, some people are past the point of saving, even more when they don’t want to be saved. OOOOH IS THIS FORESHADOW????

- That poor man tho.

Zee: She dum

Kat : THEY BOTH ARE

Giu: Even Jack is smarter

Nat: Mary and Nick would make a good couple

Zee: NO DON’T

Kat: Ew

Giu: After all those years can’t he read enochian? I mean….I’d pick up one thing or two like….

- Can’t they use that box for Michael?

*Nick drills a hole in it*

welp....never fucking mind

Giu: WELL THAT WAS STUPID. the fuck, one could think that a damn enochian box would be more resilient. Nope...just ...drill into it

Zee: You just read what you wrote right??

Giu: Yep. Your dirty minds do the rest

Kat: I like this demon

- [lucifer is dead] Abraxy “ Is he?...cool”

Nat: I love this demon too

Nat :Stop the whining

Giu: Omg Mark your acting tho

- Sam’s commander voice : GeT aWaY frOm her

- oompf

Kat: Damn it, she’s saved

- Goddamn it Nick

- Abraxy :” Lucifer planned the whole thing”

[us looking at Nick like we are in the office] 

- This cracks me up so much...I couldn’t stop laughing while making this gif. The more you look at it , the funnier it gets.

Giu: Oh that was ...kinda hot. DEAN NAUGHTY

Nat : DEAN'S SEXY WHEN HE SPEAKS LATIN. a new kink i never knew I had

Giu : *hearing some italian sounding words* DAMN RIGHT. Welcome to my world Nat.

Zee: Sam pant

Nat: Never not sexy

Giu: H.O.T.

- Nick killing who killed his family and getting his “revenge”

Giu: is Nick finished being a fucking twat.

- Donna saves the day like the badass bitch that she is

Sam: “I’m sorry I couldn’t help you, I’m sorry I didn’t know how “

Nick: “It’s not about you Sam, It’s never about you. You couldn’t fix me ‘cause I don’t want to be fixed. I was never broken”

Zee&Nat&Giu : I was never broken

Giu: Oh shut up all of you

- Sam:”Yes Nick, you are. I don’t feel sorry for you, Nick. I feel sorry for the people you hurt, the people you murdered, the people whose faces will hunt you, everynight, for the rest of your life.”

Nat&Kat: You can burn

Giu : That was hot and painful Sam, thank

- Mary: “I know what have you been building, planning. And we are gonna talk about that. We are all three of us,gonna talk about that. So if you don’t tell Sam....I will

Giu: OH WOW FOR ONCE SHE DONE RIGHT

- Dean: “It’s a Mal’ak box”

-COOL....I DON’T LIKE IT

Nat :FUCK. WHAT.WHAT?

Zee: A CAGE OF SORTS

Giu: IS HE GONNA FUCKING. NO. FUCK

Kat : MY SMART BABY

Giu: No ...no smart….that is masochist. THAT’S TERRIBLE

Nat: Does he want to buried alive, oh yeah, Sam just said it. NO

Kat: Worse.

Giu: WHAT THE FUCK

Zee: DROP HIM IN THE PACIFIC??

Nat: HE WANTS TO KILL HIMSELF

Giu: HE WILL NOT DIE THO. THIS IS SO MUCH WORSE, IM NOT EVEN GONNA GET OFF CAPS.

Nat: WELL, HE WILL SOONER OR LATER

Giu: BUT WOULDN’T M KEEP HIM ALIVE THO

- Sam: “You and Michael, trapped...for eternity?”

- Dean: “It’s the only sane play I’ve got”

- Dean:” The door is giving. I can feel it giving”

Kat: NO DEAN WINCHESTER YOU SHUT YOUR FACE. I LOVE YOU FOR TRYING

Nat: SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH

- Dean banging a fist on the box is like he just punched my heart ok

-We all are Sam

- Sam:”Since when do we believe in fate?”

 Yall literally met her

Giu: DID HE JUST…...FUCK U

Nat:: I DON'T WANNA WATCH. BURN THIS EPISODE.BURN IT

- Dean: “ Sam you are the last person I could tell, the last person that I could be around. ‘Cause you are the only one that could’ve talked me out of it. And I won’t be talked out of it. I won’t. I’m doing this”

Zee: IM SCARED

Kat :OMG IM CRYING AGAIN

Nat: SAMMY'S HURTING SO BAD. DEAN AVOIDS SAM CUZ SAM IS THE ONLY ONE WHO COULD STOP HIM.

Giu: I FEEL SICK

Kat: OUR BOYS

yeah great this feels like the soul bomb and Amara bullshit, FUCKING GREAT.

Giu: THE MUSIC. FUCK THIS MUSIC.

- Sam starting to understand that Dean is “right”

- Dean:” You could let me do it alone, or you could help me” 

ARE YOU FUCKING KID-

- Sam: “All right”

me: *splutters*

Zee :REALLY??!!!

Zee : All right??!!! ALL RIGHT??

Nat:  FUCK I WILL NEVER STOP SCREAMING

Kat : The end.

Giu: Of my life , the end ….

Nat: WHAT THE FUCK. YOU GOTTA BE KIDDING ME.

Giu: *scrambles to see the next promo*

Zee: Yeets behind you

Nat: I'M NOT OK. SOMEONE HOLD ME.

Kat: Always talk about how good Jensen is. Jared fucking killed me here

                                [After the 14x12 promo]

Giu: ...OK WHAT THE FUCK

Nat: NO, YEAH.. STILL NOT OK AFTER THE PREVIEW

Kat: Okay so preview. I think they are just trying out the box

Giu: what the fuuuuck. That’s horrible

Zee: Did he do it for real??

Giu: It’s Dean...he was deadly serious

Zee: Yeah!! Next episode. Don’t want that

Kat: I don’t think they’ll dump him yet,but something obviously goes wrong. I don’t want to wait a week but also don’t really want it to come

Giu: Did Dean seriously asked Sam to stay on the fucking phone until what?!

Zee: He ded? Sank? Dropped?

Kat : STOP IT

Giu: Anyway I’m still positive that M grace will keep Dean alive

Zee: In the box??

Giu: I mean he did tell Jack they would have been together for eons. His body at least. I mean dean’s mind can get shoved somewhere . But since M is a sadistic motherfucker , I bet he would make Dean feel everything. While keeping his vessel alive.

Kat: Of course he would. He made him drown inside his own head

Zee: We need the body too. Not sorry. Yeah but for how long ?

Giu: Well he can’t get out. I doubt Micheal would kill himself.

Zee: True. But also stay trapped for ever?

Giu: M is patient

Kat: I feel like that would be a fate worse than death for him. But he is patient af

Giu: I need to go have a jog because my whole body is wired up in tension

Zee: I need to crumble in a corner and slowly die

Kat: I can’t sleep, I’m all riled up again

Nat: * is trying to clock in at work*

. Well well WHAT A FUCKING RIDE.

WE HATED IT.

.

.

If you want to get tagged in the future ones send an ask HERE or to @waywardbaby or a smoke signal, idk whatever I’m tired af.

TAGS: @supernatural-teamfreewillpage  @destiel-honeypie   @mariekoukie6661   @dragontamerm    @closetspngirl @rainflowermoon @mattiecat   @bunnybaby121115 @aliaitee2 @jacks-word-of-the-day @4evamc  @dammitsammy @legendary-destiel @winchesterprincessbride

[stokan]

Top 20 Things of 2018

1.) Beychella How do you make a long awaited surprise album between two of the biggest names in music that is also one of the year’s best feel like complete afterthought? Set the bar as high as Beyonce’s Coachella appearance.

First awards show performances, then music videos, now music festival gigs: is there anything that Beyonce CAN’T turn into high art?

2.) Explained by Vox The most exciting development in the world of television in 2018 was radically breaking the rules on episodes length. We saw 30 minute dramas, and hour long comedies. We got shows like Maniac where episodes were as long as 49 minutes and as short as 27 minutes. Now television creators can tell exactly the stories they want to tell in however much time they want to tell them in. And perhaps nowhere were these loosened restrictions taken better advantage than Explained, Vox’s documentary series for Netflix. Many topics cant sustain a full length documentary, but, say, 14 minutes explaining cryptocurrency to me? Sure! 17 minutes on designer DNA? Sounds great! 20 minutes on the origins of K-Pop? How do you say “yes please” in Korean? Every episode has a different narrator, a different look, a different feel, and varies wildly in subject matter. Yet they are all exactly the length they need to be. The only thing left I really need explained to me is why no one thought to make this series before.

3.) Serial Season 3 If Explained was a great example of the latest evolution in television, then the new season of Serial is at the front line of the evolution of our newest artistic medium: podcasts. Serial’s third season was nothing like its second, which was in turn nothing like its first. It’s a series still figuring out what it CAN be, while now defining forever what it NEEDS to be. Serial this year explained a deeply important topic in a way that wouldn’t have been possible through any other medium. They always say if you’re a writer you have to ask yourself what form of writing your idea needs to be. Don’t write a play that’s really a TV show, or a movie that should be a book. And now we can add to that don’t make a TV series that’s really a podcast. As Homecoming proved this year, the two mediums are very different and better equipped to tell different stories. And after hearing Serial Season Three I can’t imagine there will ever be a better way to explore the current American criminal justice system. It was 2018’s version of Upton Sinclair’s The Jungle. It may not change national food safety standards, but it hopefully will do something perhaps even more important: it will make us never again take lightly the election of local judges and sheriffs. It was a podcast for the heart, the head, and the time capsule.

4.) Black Mirror - “Hang the DJ” I know this technically came out December 29th 2017 but I’m counting it here because nothing was more 2018 than this. The sadness, the isolation, the uncertainty, the living in a world you don’t understand the rules of anymore, the unfairness of modern life, but the ultimate perseverance of hope and love: it’s all there in the best episode of Black Mirror’s third season. It made me cry out of sadness and happiness in equal measure. Could anything be more 2018 than that?

5.) Kesha at the Grammys Ok so maybe one thing was more 2018.

The Grammys, an organization led by Neil Portnow, a man who said this year that “women need to step up”, and an organization that didn’t offer its one female Album of the Year nominee a solo performance spot, also offered us 2018’s most powerful show of female solidarity and one of the most moving moments of the Me Too era. It all amounted to the perfect encapsulation of this year. Kesha scream crying and then collapsing into a sea of strong supportive women WAS 2018.

6.) Eighth Grade My favorite movie of the year was also the year’s best horror movie. It was so real, and visceral, and intense, and frightening that at times I literally had to remind myself to breathe. I watched at least half the movie through my fingers and on the edge of my seat. Proving what everyone who has lived through it already knows: there’s nothing in the world more terrifying than being in junior high.

7.) Big Mouth Speaking of junior high, the other side of the pain and trauma of growing up is humor, so why it took this long for someone to make a comedy series explicitly about puberty is beyond me. I guess, of course, making a show like this work is a fine needle to thread. It wouldn’t work without being animated and being on a streaming service that lets them go as far as they did. It wouldn’t work without writing that is both laugh out loud funny and deeply compassionate and human in equal measure. And it wouldn’t work without one of the best voice casts on TV, including a true tour de force from Maya Rudolph. But work does it ever. In a just world junior high health class homework would be simply watching this show.

8.) Emma Gonzalez speech Here’s how long 2018 was: this was from 2018.

Finishing off my personal 2018 Growing Up Trifecta is the most powerful 12 minutes of the year. That high school students could be more inspiring, articulate, and better leaders than the President of the United States is sadly, at this point, a given. But that they are now more effective and efficient than him at starting genuine political movements still feels revolutionary. The kids are our future, and our future has never looked brighter.

9.) Childish Gambino - “This is America” video 100 years from now if theres only one cultural artifact that still exists and is still remembered from 2018 this will be it. A “you know where you were the first time you saw it” level cultural event. No song will ever be more closely associated with its music video, and no music video will ever be more of an avatar for an entire cultural moment than this. THIS is, of course, a truly shocking and horrifying (in a good way) music video from the former fifth lead of the TV show Community. A profound and brilliant piece of art underscored by a fun-sounding dance song. The year’s most complex and important social-political message delivered in 4 minutes via YouTube. This is America indeed.

10.) Drake - “God’s Plan” video While Donald Glover may have perfected the music video as art form, it goes without saying that long ago Drake mastered the music video as promotional tool. And in that sense the music video for “God’s Plan” seems like minor failure. It seemed to sort of come and go from the culture, especially in light of the success of the In My Feelings Challenge. But for me, there was nothing more heartwarming and human this year than watching Drake give away almost a million dollars to strangers. It was an idea so simple it’s shocking no one had ever done it before. And so affecting I was shocked it didn’t seem to penetrate the public consciousness more. There’s so much going on at all times now it’s hard for anything to truly break through all the noise, but this really deserved to. It’s impossible to watch this without smiling, and is there anything 2018 needed more than that?

11.) Nanette The dumbest debate this year was whether or not Nanette was stand up. Form and genre aren’t delineators still worth discussing in 2018. It’s now only about the message and the messenger, everything else is just details. An important fresh voice, the most timely, and sadly, timeless message imaginable, delivered in a way that reached and deeply affected seemingly every person you knew? What is there to debate? Nanette may or may not be stand up comedy, but it’s definitely RISE UP comedy. And in the end, that’s all that matters.

12.) Amber Says What Please click on the link above. The final two minutes are by far the best comedy of 2018. It still makes me laugh so hard that it causes me physical pain. You’ve been warned.

13.) A Star is Born trailers A Star is Born is maybe a perfect film. The performances, the songs, the direction, the fact that there’s literally no human being on earth who could have played her part and made the movie work like it did other than Lady Gaga. It was all perfect. But there was actually something better than watching A Star is Born: anticipating watching a A Star is Born. Before the first A Star is Born trailer came out I thought the whole project sounded dumb and unnecessary. After I finished watching the first trailer I knew I was going to see A Star is Born opening night. True story: I was at a movie where the same A Star is Born trailer got played three times in a row for some reason. And it was riveting every time. There was no grumbling at all in the audience, and I for one was sad when it didn’t replay a fourth time. So as much as I loved A Star is Born what I would really love is be able to still want to see A Star is Born for the first time.

14.) Ariana Grande - “thank u, next” It’s genuinely impressive that a song released in November could be the song I listened to by far the most this year. Somehow it took less than two months for this song to feel completely ubiquitous. Hell, even the PHRASE “thank u, next” is omnipresent now. Forget Song of the Summer, this was maybe our first Song of the Winter. Which is perfect because has a hit pop song ever sounded more winter? It’s cold, but it keeps you warm. It’s the sadness of the holidays with the life reaffirming joy of the holiday season. It’s a sweater for you to wear on the dance floor. And it’s clearly exactly the song so many of us needed. No matter how many times I’ve heard it (and as I said, I’ve listened to it, uh, A LOT) its existence feels like a holiday miracle. Having a new and fresh take on the breakup song in the year 2018? That shit IS amazing.

15.) The proposal at the Emmys This is literally the only thing anyone remembers about this year’s Emmys. It was amazing, and special, and made anyone who watched it believe in true love. But for me it still cant touch the most heart-melting awards show moment of all time: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lCJrku4fSxk

(Was this whole entry just an excuse to link to one of my absolute favorite YouTube clips? Perhaps.)

16.) Succession When I saw the promos for Succession I literally made the sound UGH out loud. The last thing the world needs is another show about rich white people behaving badly, I thought. How could there possibly be anything original left to say on that topic? Who on earth is still greenlighting shows like this in The Year of our Lord 2018?

People much smarter than I am clearly, that’s who.

Because from writing, acting, production design, direction - whatever element you want to focus on - this was the best and most exciting new show of 2018 by a wide margin. People have been saying for years that TV is the new movies; this show made movies look like the old TV. It was the most vibrant and perfectly crafted big budget feature film of 2018, stretched out over 8 episodes on HBO. Did it have anything new and important to say about the world? Probably not. And turns out, I couldn’t have cared less. The phrase compulsively watchable might have been invented just to describe the world these actors and writers created. I would watch the team involved with this show dry paint. 

17.) Angels in America on Broadway Angels in America is the best play of the past 30 years and its not even close. So the fact that it would get a production that’s this good is just unfair for everyone else on this planet who makes theater. It was so good it made all other plays I’ve seen since seem small and cheap and unimportant. It was such a towering achievement that it has made the entire rest of theater as an art form seem insignificant by comparison. When you hear old people talk about seeing Brando in Streetcar or watching the original production of Death of Salesman I now can relate to what they are talking about. I’ll be thinking about Andrew Garfield’s final monologue for the rest of my life. It was unfair that we the audience had to all leave the theater when the lights finally came up and that we couldn’t all just live in that feeling forever. The eight hours I spent watching this play are what art is all about.

18.) Jesse Plemons in Game Night If dying is easy, and comedy is hard, then they should cancel the Oscars and give Jesse Plemmons Best Supporting Actor right now for his work in Game Night. And ok, maybe it wasn’t the BEST performance of 2018, but it was DEFINITELY the best performance relative to what it needed to be. It should have been a dumb throwaway part in a big-budget mainstream ensemble comedy. But Jesse Plemmons crafted a performance so strange and singular and memorable that it elevated the entire movie into something way better than I’m sure even its creators expected. I legitimately don’t know how everyone didn’t break in every one of his scenes. It’s a master class in the comedic power of silence. It should be studied in acting classes everywhere. And 20 years from now when Game Night is considered a comedy classic, Jesse Plemmons will be the main reason why. You heard it here first.

19.) The 1975 - A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships Saxophones? Electric guitar solos? Backing choirs? A concept album about being uncomfortable with the internet? Dumb pretentious song titles? This album couldn’t be any more in my wheelhouse if I made it myself. Its best song is basically a modern reimagining of “We Didn’t Start the Fire” for God’s sake!

For me this wasn’t just an album, it was an experience. It was big music to get lost inside of. And I did. At age 36 it’s nice to know that sometimes I can still feel 16. And it’s fitting that a band named The 1975 would be the ones to make music that’s so transporting.

20.) Emma Stone Ok so as someone who once argued in this very space that Emma Stone deserved an Oscar nomination for Easy A, it’s clear I’m pretty deep in the tank for Emma Stone. But even an Emma Stone hater would have to admit than this was a banner year for Emma Stone. Signing up for the insane acting challenge that was Maniac and completely acing it while totally exposing two-time Oscar nominee Jonah Hill in the process? Going toe to toe with Olivia Colman in the battle of the best acting performances of the year in The Favourite? Coming across as more charming than Jennifer freaking Lawrence ?!?

2018 was Emma Stone’s year, we were all just living in it.

[gracetoecuadorexchange]

Engaging

Well, after another week of fighting more avidly against boredom, I am feeling pretty good about myself.

I got lucky last week after failing to do anything for the first day of my three-day weekend. Rosetta joined my family and me at a traditional countryside restaurant, although her refusal to eat food (the premise being that she wasn’t hungry having just had lunch herself) came back later with a vengeance in the form of ordering a full pizza and chicken hamburger at the park we walked around later. Even Henriette, who I’d thought would miss out as she was sick, joined us. She and Rosetta took a paddle boat around the man-made river.

Monday, although almost as activity-less as Saturday, still had something to do--make a “lemon pie” with Mami Nina I could take to Tuesday’s picnic at school. I say “lemon pie” in quotation marks because it was truly just a glorified casserole; without the baking, or spices, or really anything that goes into a casserole or pie. After layering the bottom of a casserole dish in plain cookies, then spreading a mixture of condensed milk, 50% milk, and lemon juice over the cookies, the process was repeated one more time. I got to leave my two lays of cookies and milk in the fridge for the next day and wonder how in the world I was expected to keep it cool while at school waiting for the last class.

I still don’t know what Tuesday’s picnic was celebrating, but it may have to do with diplomas/certificates that were given to some students at the start of the day.

I have no idea what gets you these diplomas as the year hasn’t ended, but I assume it’s a good thing as the studious kids were the ones called up. I can’t say I am one of the studious kids, but I did pay attention and even got homework and points in classes (except Quimica--Chemistry--because I hate everything about it with a burning passion).

Thankfully my worries over keeping the “pie” cool were assuaged when Mami Ale told me I could ask the snack bar to put it in their fridge. When the picnic rolled around as our last hour of the day, I was able to present my full sized “lemon pie”/casserole-stacked-cookies-not-even-baked thing to impress all my peers. Other “dishes” brought by these freshman-aged students included; Nutella, potato chips, pizza chips, chifle (chEEflay--salted banana chips), strawberries, Coca-Cola, caramel dip, packaged cookies (I took some home to savor later) and some gummy rings. It entertained a few students when I tried the potato chips with Nutella, and Aldo went so far as to test the pizza flavored chips with the chocolate as well.

Even at home I felt productive, able to work on some slides in a presentation I would be an active part of in school next Monday.

Wednesday and I investigated half-heartedly into the running organization one of my classmates is in, “Federation”--like Star Fleet!

I made sure to talk to my school group when Theatre class did nothing, and I even taught a camp game.

By the end of the day I had confirmation that grades would start being written down for me, which is a huge win. It’s hard to keep track of your language progress and feel like you’re doing good. Getting outright confirmation on schoolwork will definitely help in stabilizing how I feel I’m doing. Also, school work is insanely easy (except Quimica because no one wants you, Quimica) which is bad for the students that should actually be engaging and learning, but good for me as I already learned most things in depth in eighth grade.

Wednesday also marked the day I finally got the mail package containing a few things I hadn’t packed the first time around: a small stuffed bear that I like to brag has traveled the world, a large American flag, more journals since it’s been a little over a month and I’ve filled almost the entirety of my first one, and some documents bureaucracy prevented from finishing in time for my arrival.

I had learned from a friend that Venom was out, so of course I took this opportunity to try and connect with friends and watch the movie. Unfortunately, Mami Ale changed these plans without first consulting me, and movie watching was put off for Thursday, meaning I had to be that irresponsible jerk friend that cancels with only 2 hours to go.

This also happened to be the day Tete, the pregnant dog, was expected to have puppies, so I was given the option to stay home. My entire social life is currently at school, so I declined. I still got cake, as I think they were celebrating the new puppies even though nothing had happened (or would happen until the eleventh--that’s what happens when you assume dogs operate on human expectations).

With no one but me needing to wake early on Thursday for school and work, I had to walk down to Cruz del Norte. Unfortunately, sidewalks are not a guarantee, and I’m pretty sure my nice white uniform shoes were covered in a thin layer of dust and not smelling fresh by the time I was in the building. It didn’t help that I couldn’t shower that morning when the water pressure fizzled out as I washed my hands.

On the up side, I now had my trusty stuffed bear Jarfrey, who was a hit with the ladies of my friend group. I passed him off during PE, and by the end of it, Katherin claimed he was her husband.

Katherin was the Ecuadorian friend I had planned to watch Venom with the day before, along with the only exchange student that responded in our group chat when I first sent the invite out. Unfortunately, something came up and she couldn’t make it, but lucky for me, now Marcela could.

Her mother accidentally introduced herself as Marcela’s sister, but it was sorted out rather quickly and we watched Venom. Totally in Spanish. I think I understood about 50% of spoken words, followed 90% of the plot, and caught 40% of the jokes. On the car ride home I learned the family had a Wii U, so I will be looking into a Mario Kart tournament sometime in the future.

I didn’t get a chance to see Tete and her new-born puppies when I got home, but that was rectified the next morning.

Friday dawned, and people were late rising-- except for me because I’m always up at 6 and ready to leave by 6:45 as I was told to be. I saw the three little black puppies Tete can now call herself mother of, but I still haven’t dared to touch any of them in case that would hurt something.

At school, Marcela joined in Inktober late, coining the term ‘Latetober’ and letting me join in as well, along with Ysabella. In English while Marie was stepping out to find Henriette and my desk mates were talking amongst themselves, I drew a hamburger and a tiny hungry cat since the first day’s theme was ‘comida’.

Jarfrey of course joined me this day as well, becoming Marcela’s wrist adornment as she beat us all in the basketball game trying to make shots from different positions.

I learned from Marie halfway through the day that exchange students would be having a picnic. I have not kept up at all with the exchange students, but a picnic sounded nice and it’d be fun to enjoy the outdoors for a little while. I got to the park with four liters of sparkling apple juice and twenty cups--that’s right, I remembered to bring something to actually serve beverages in. I was the only one to remember to do so, and no one brought plates.

At one point, the French boy across from me passed Kinder chocolate under the table and we joked he was our drug dealer. He was the same one to eat tuna straight from the bag and try rip-off Cheeto puffs with guacamole. My second picnic of the week ended a little while after one of the girls got out their Ukulele and another sang along to ‘Riptide’.

It didn’t end before a woman we later learned had no connection to any of us sat down at the table and asked about exchange. People ended up leaving the chips and Nutella with her when we left for a walk. My day finished around 12 am as I enjoyed the two new Miraculous Ladybug episodes (2 in a day again!) and I started off the new weekend right.

Once more, I have fought off boredom, this time engaging in a combination of movies, drawing, and haphazard excuses to eat a ton of junk food with friends. !Ole!

[christiluv]

Dear President Trump

The Democrats keep blocking me from writing you at Whitehouse.gov, because they have essentially ruined my life, so now I must write this open public letter to you, because it is the only way to reach out to you.

......................... ABOUT YOU .........................

Dear Mr. President,

First and foremost, I'd just like to say that my family and I voted for you in 2016, and you are the 1st GOP presidential candidate that I myself have ever cast my vote for at the ballot box. We have GREAT respect for you, your WONDERFUL family and your PHENOMENAL empire, which you have created.

We admire your strength and intelligence, The First Lady's beauty and style, and your kids' grace and poise, following in your footsteps of greatness. We are very proud of you and all the amazing things you have accomplished. We think you're doing a FANTASTIC job!

We also hope that your party falls in line and works with you to get more done, so that you can win again in 2020 as well as in the midterms, and do more good work for "We The People".

You are most certainly-- a "winner"!!! --And we LIKE your tweets!

..................... ABOUT US ....................

~ ME ~

I'm a writer, who's been writing since childhood, won awards for both singing, songwriting, poetry and essays, and I beat out hundreds of teens, chosen to write for The Orlando Sentinel Newspaper as teen journalist and music / concert reviewer.

I studied writing and film in college, wrote, produced and directed the film short, "A Babysitter's Nightmare", and also collaborated with my writing partner / Mom, to write, produce and direct the music video "Love Dance". I've been a church youth leader, who wrote several newsletters and an advice column, and I have a strong social media presence, writing blogs, Youtube "TV" videos, audio books, and a soap opera, "The Young and The Powerful".

Between Facebook, Youtube and Twitter,  I have gained over 10K fans, with songs trending at #1 on ReverbNation for over a year now, and my video / audiobook, "@VirginLoveTV presents The Top 3 Reasons Why I Stopped Dating-- A #VirginSecrets #RealTalk Chat with Christi Luv", and GarageBand album, "@GirlPowerTV presents #CrowdfundThis Til We #RevivePOPmusic!" --An Original Song Sampler CD & MP3, out on Soundcloud and ReverbNation, and soon to be on Amazon.

Some of the novels I've authored include The Book Club Elite acclaimed YA paranormal romance mystery adventure, "Chris Taylor's Hunting Love: The Curse of The Blood Red Seductress", the MG superhero fantasy action adventure, "Chris Taylor's Angel Wars: Comet & Lady Phantom Rise", and the YA murder mystery conspiracy thriller, "The Killer Secrets of Skyler Stone: My Funny Valentine", as well as many screenplays, titles, and a catalog of hit blockbuster commercial concepts, including the inspirational YA paranormal romance mystery drama, "Love Me Tender: The Existence of Sound".

~ MOM ~

My Mom is a veteran performer of stage, tours (Marvelettes, Platters), TV, Broadway, Film ("Hair!", U. A.), and recording (Motown, CBS), with songs published ("Maybe, Maybe Not", "Smile", E.M.I. Italy), and a studio singer on film soundtracks ("The Point", "Lion King"). She's written poems, stories, and stage plays since youth, later wrote, produced, and directed many summer youth productions, and has received awards from The Orlando Bureau of Recreation, Young Adults Progressive Club, NY Chamber of Commerce & Ohio Mayor's Office Recognition Awards for her work, presented by S.T.A.A (Support The Artists of America).

She wrote, produced and directed a PBS TV documentary, "Did You Know? Well You Should!", which won wide acclaim, was a journalist and theatre / film critic columnist for 5 years with The Orlando Times Newspaper. Affiliations include ASCAP, SAG - AFTRA, WGA, and FMPTA, with her PBS broadcasted TV special, "@BlackHeroesTV presents #HEROisTheNewBLACK!"--a positive documentary film series pilot, and "@GirlPowerTV presents #SupportHiddenLegends 2 #SaveMusicLegacies" Blog Journal, coming soon to Amazon.com.

Some of the novels TP has authored include The Book Club Elite acclaimed YA psychological drama suspense mystery, "T.D. Perkins' The Boy Next Door", and the YA social human interest drama, "T.D. Perkins' In His Shoes", as well as many screenplay scripts, titles, and a catalog of hit blockbuster commercial concepts, including the YA romantic horror mystery comedy, "Bite Me!".

Together, we write both fiction and nonfiction, in multiple genres, with an eye for promoting better positive role model characters of more diverse colors, heroes, and the spiritual power and beauty of God. We also write our novels as screenplays, with the end goal of producing them as blockbuster films. We have also written and compiled over 20 blog-journals together, including, "@MySoulFireTV presents The Hi-5-IQ Homeschooler's Guide To Critical Thinking ~ An Educational Textbook Series Overview & Notebook", which will be out soon on Amazon.

......................................... ABOUT OUR FAMILY .........................................

We are The Perkins Family. We've volunteered, donated, and hosted fund-raisers for other peoples' noble causes, and given to many charities, regularly over decades. On the creative front, we have conscientiously woven important social and moral causes into all of our written works, music and productions, and seek to educate and enlighten as well as entertain. We live in a racially mixed middle class neighborhood in Altamonte Springs, Florida. Born into a blended melting pot of Native American, Black and German blood in our ancestry, we come from a great family legacy of American History.

I spring from a noted genius musician and arranger dad, who graduated from a military academy.My grandpa was a military Veteran and former Sergeant, who fought for our country in World War 2, and lost his left hand. My great grandfather William Warley-- a Black Newspaper Owner / Editor / Publisher and NAACP Leader-- fought in 1917 to racially desegregate the housing communities in Louisville, Kentucky, with the historic U.S. Supreme Court case of Buchanan vs Warley-- and WON-- which is why he named her grandma "Victoria"-- for their/our "VICTORY". My uncle served in The Air Force, and other family members have served in various positions, or are currently serving our country and faith in other powerful ways. So the work we and our family have done and still do has given back to others in multiple ways. We look forward to giving back even more in creative ways.

.......................................... ABOUT THIS LETTER ..........................................

The reason why I'm writing you this letter is because some (and perhaps many) of us over in The I-4 Corridor purple swing state of Florida are being persecuted by at least 1 of 3 organized entities-- Utilities, Inc, Duke Energy, and an unidentified biological engineering agency that has been abusing their power in our home.

Utilities Inc and Duke Energy have cut off our-- and other peoples'-- water and power, over stupid technicalities and errors that were their fault or their orchestration, and there has been no compensation for all the business, health, and sanity that was lost from it.

We have consulted lawyers and are considering our lawsuit options to sue them. But what we need from you is your attention to the fact that these companies have no competition-- and that is why they get away with murder, hurting millions of seniors, veterans, and shut-ins all over the state and country.

Many people have worked hard but are still living paycheck to paycheck because the fields that they are good at or have expertise in do not pay them well, or no one will give them a better gig than what they have-- or they're too old or too sick to matriculate in the rough and tumble job market. These people need protection from vulture monopolies-- and competitive capitalism is the answer.

Won't you stand up for healthy competition for the monopolies that control peoples' lives?

We are literally starving artists, as there is no food in our fridge right now, but we are hungry for more than just physical tangible food--

We are hungry for change.

We are hungry for truth.

We are hungry for triumph.

We're also hungry for food--

But right now, we are passionately hungry for justice.

Will you help us fight back against the tyranny of the greedy monopolies that dominate our daily lives?

Before we file an official lawsuit against these companies, preferably this month, we are asking you or your people to step in and make an example of our utilities company and power company, using our situation to show why Free Market Capitalism-- the realm that you MASTER like a KING-- and the competition that makes it work-- are all so important to our society-- and to show that people-- especially those who have health problems, disabilities, and/or are aging seniors, who've worked all their lives and deserve a break now-- should not live and die on computer glitches and stupid procedural technicalities-- or company error.

It would also prove to all the ridiculously dumb haters and lying traitors out there that you really do care about people of color too, cause you're not racist like they try to slander you as, and it also shows everyone that you're so likable and winning that you got a socially conservative Independent (me) and Democrat (mom) to vote for you in 2016-- simply because--

--you just got it like that.

Either way, you would be doing good for good people, all over Central Florida, as well as doing good for a family that just so happens to come from a historic legacy of noble American History, honorable military veteran service, and uniquely creative giftedness.

We are suffering terribly-- constantly hungry and stressed out-- and I do believe that The Agency directing such negative things in our lives is savage, vicious, inhumane, abusive, haughty and vile. The evil way they torment us is cruel and unusual punishment-- and it needs to stop, like yesterday.

Please use your power to make them STOP doing bad things to us. Please rescue us. We put our hopes in Obama and he let us down. So now it's your turn. Please be our hero and show our old liberal friends-- and new conservative ones-- why we voted for you.

We are desperate for relief-- as ANY relief is GOOD relief at this point, and if things don't let up, I will have to hitchhike at night on the highway, to the ocean-- just to escape the pain and torture of it all.

We believe in you.

And I believe that as soon as this letter meets your eyes-- or your reader's eyes-- you'll come to our rescue and save our day, like The Big Man On Campus that you are. Because you are The Leader of our FREE World, The Head of our State, The Commander In Chief who WE voted for and supported the candidacy of, from jump street. We knew you were gonna win as soon as you said you were running!

That's how much faith we had in you!

So whether you get personally involved or you delegate someone on a lower level to get involved with this case, I know in my heart, soul, and gut that somehow you will help to fix this mess-- cause God put you in power to fight for the PEOPLE and make RIGHT what all the incompetent apathetic LOSERS do WRONG.

Because THAT'S who you ARE.

We are on your side, we have always been on your side during this election cycle, and we will remain standing by your side-- if we have any legs left to stand on by the end of this summer, month and week. Cause we're falling apart at the seams and when I prayed to God to deliver us, He told me to go directly to you, surpass all others, and reach out to the one in the highest office--

--and that's you.

Our last remaining hope...

Thank you. God Bless you. And if you see fit, we also welcome you to help support our efforts to help seniors, veterans and shut-ins in our Christian, faith-based Angel Hearts Art Club crowdfund project to raise funds to help the community at Patreon.com/SoulFireTV, and our effort to cure painful issues like my medical matters at Patreon.com/CureMeTV.

Thank you for reading this. We hope to hear from you or your people soon. We know you're busy dealing with crazy psycho dictators and whatnot... Hope all is well! :) And thanks so much for saving us all from this indecent hell!

God Bless!

Sincerely, Christi Luv AKA Chris Taylor 407-227-3710 / 407-788-8986 / MyTopShelfEditing@Gmail.com ReverbNation.com/ChristiLuv / MyArtHaven.WixSite.com/Shop

OUR URGENT CAUSE CAMPAIGNS:

Patreon.com/CureMeTV (To Pay For My Medicine)

Patreon.com/ChristiLuv (To Support Other Causes Including: Angel Hearts Art Club for Seniors, Vets & Shut-Ins & Crowdfund To Turn Our Positive, Original, Inspirational Teen and Young Adult Reading Novels Into Graphic Novels)